Some Follow Up Questions About Feed Me's New Column

I'm beginning to suspect some of you never leave the political cultural sphere and just think that's DC's fault somehow

The age-old question of whether or not DC has a soul was a few weeks back tackled by editor Cami Fateh in Feed Me. It’s a brilliantly written piece by a clearly talented author about a party that, admittedly, doesn’t sound half-bad. Aspects of it resemble the DC parties I know — that “poll on the wall” trend is even more of a thing in DC than everywhere else, and the themed Capitol Hill playlist is a pretty good bit for a themed party. Who doesn’t love a themed party.

But I was struck by… how do I put this kindly? The slightly delusional vibes emanating from the hosts.

Behold: DC culture.

Let’s unpack a few lines in this piece. Firstly:

“In New York, people see the contradiction (between themselves and people on ‘the other side’) and then just give up,” noted Sarah Beth. But in DC, everyone’s “rubbing shoulders with everyone.”

The premise that most 20-something liberal DCers are spending time with the MAGA contingent is... distant from reality. Certainly it has at times been the case that Republicans and Democrats mix and rub elbows in DC in a way that would be uncommon in other cities. I think that’s less true now, for one major reason: If I were to befriend a MAGA girlie nowadays, I’d be befriending the people who have made all of my federal government friends’ lives a living hell for the past year.

You want to talk about DC culture? The real DC culture was the moment in February where someone would ask “how’s work” and your beloved friend would let out a deep sigh and going “well, I was working at USAID/US Institute for Peace/any federal agency, until…” Now THAT is culture. About a quarter of my social circle was out of a job in February, and I really, truly do not think most of that social circle wants to hang out with people who feel that was a good thing. Why would anyone want to hear about how them being fired was for the good of society? Who would want that?

Sorry to those who feel this makes me an idiot or pro-censorship or a radical leftist or whatever. I think I’ll live.

Via OpenTable: Butterworth’s on Capitol Hill.

It may not shock you to hear that neither party host (particularly Kelly) conveys many firm political beliefs. This is perhaps unsurprising, given they met at Butterworth’s, which is quite literally DC’s MAGA establishment. So perhaps we shouldn’t feel surprised that these two party hosts have this impression of DC culture.

Washington DC voted for Harris by 92.5%. Even the tiny Republican minority in the city went for Nikki Haley in our primary. So maybe it’s unsurprising that those attending the purposefully bipartisan party aren’t engaging with a real city when they engage with DC. See this quote:

“D.C. usually lacks soulfulness,” opined editor and digital strategist Jed Miller, who’d just gotten another martini from the open bar located on the top floor of the house. Jed claimed that Washingtonians, unlike New Yorkers, tended to be very earnest, but not necessarily soulful. (Being soulful, he thought, meant having “some comfort with unhappiness.”) It’s true that many parties here are work parties, punctuated by name tags and anodyne schmoozing, with guests who have been media-trained since their 7th grade class-presidential election. Tonight was an exception.

Firstly: Sure, many parties here are that way. And many parties here are not that way, if you have, like, friends. Secondly, I have to wonder what groups of people, exactly, the speaker thinks have no soul. The commenter who pointed out the following was onto something:

Also imagine saying this to a Black person in DC aka Chocolate City, home of Howard Campus (literally the best dressed campus in the country), “D.C. usually lacks soulfulness.” I guess they really know their crowd.

I’m not a Howard student but I really do have to wonder if these party attendees know any non-DC transplants. This is describing a very niche part of DC, and not the one most DC residents live in nowadays — even those of us who do work in the political scene. I must ask a very serious question: Do any of you speak to anyone who doesn’t work in politics?

To act as if the place to find DC’s soul is a political event filled with Navy Yard residents is just strange. Join a Discord server. Subscribe to 730DC. Or, for God’s sake, speak to a barista, or a bartender, literally anywhere in the city. How do you live in Columbia Heights and think this way? Have you spoken to any of your neighbors?

Here are a few more lines in this article that I need you to know are normal for political parties, specifically, NOT your standard neighborhood party with forty attendees:

Jackets stayed on – it was D.C., after all – but I think the men liked having license to make fun of themselves…

In the daytime, the house is an office space belonging to her tech founder friends…

(No one taking their jackets off is a networking event vibe. This sounds like a great networking event. It’s not a party!)

Via WG New Orleans: Washington DC’s Mardi Gras, generally considered one of the largest celebrations outside of New Orleans.

For a long time, I’ve had a segment on my Substack called “What I’m Bringing Up To My DC Friends.” For a long time, I’ve been considering retiring it, because I don’t think anyone cares. But for what it’s worth, that’s never been because I think DC is soulless. There are a million things I could say to talk up DC on paper: We have a wonderful music scene, including our own native music genre, go-go; a major theater scene; and a thriving food scene, including the third highest number of Michelin starred restaurants in the United States. The wider DMV area is extremely diverse; the DMV area is the second-most popular destination for African immigrants after NYC, and we were majority Black until 2011. We have the highest LGBTQ population in the country compared to other states, which is not hugely surprising. We’re one of the most stunning cities in the country. And we also have seventeen free museums, which no other US city can say.

When I try to explain DC to others, it comes more to this: DC is the southernmost northern city, which often translates to a lovely mix of more southern kindness with northern bluntness. Yes, we’re a transplant city more than most, and yes, we have a crazy networking culture, and yes, sometimes people dress business casual to go to the coffee shop. But behind that pretense, when you depart the politics, is a kindness and passion that I think is deeply admirable.

If the only culture you’ve found or experienced is the political one, that’s fine; lord knows it’s hard to escape. But to look for culture only in politics is a losing game.

In conclusion, here are my questions for those of you unclear on whether DC has culture:

1. Do you associate with anyone who does not work (a) on the Hill, (b) as a lobbyist, or (c) in tech at a business that a friend of Peter Thiel invested in?

2. Do you have friends who aren’t your coworkers?

3. Do you speak to bartenders, baristas, and waiters as if they’re people? (I am so serious about this. I have made two real-life friends so far of the baristas at my local coffee shop and two who are bartenders.)

4. Do you speak to strangers who you did not meet at a glorified networking event?

5. Do you go to any restaurants that aren’t Butterworth’s or Le Diplomate?

6. Have you subscribed to any DC-based news sources or cultural sources?

7. Do you consider your values to be an important part of your character?

8. When you “don’t know much about an issue” as a political writer, do you ever use Google?

If the answer to these questions is no, that’s fine. And I also think you should change that before you make mass generalizations about DC’s culture, or lack thereof.